On the heels of yesterday's post about the Glow Spokes advertisement in the November/December 1973 issue of DC Comics' "Sword of Sorcery," here's a portion of another advertisement from that same issue.
The advertisement is for products from The Gayle House of Flushing, New York. There are 10 products being pitched, and it's a weird mix of stuff:
- Invite your friends over for a Haunting: Imagine how shocked your friends will be when you flip out the lights and they hear sounds like the howl of a wolf, a creeking [sic] door, chains rattling, screams, moaning and many more creepy sounds. This 7" 33-1/3 RPM special sound effects record is not sold in any store. Be the first to get it. Only $1.00.
- Mr. Baldy Bigshot Skin Head Wig: Now's your chance to play the "big shot." You'll be "the boss" when you put on this skin head wig and look several years older. You'll get a million laughs. Only $1.00.
- Giant Vampire Bat: This creepy creature of the night is made of life-like black rubber. Its wings spread out to a full 13" across and flap with a life-like motion as you jiggle its cord. Hang it in your room, car or anywhere else you think it will "shock" them. Only $1.00.
- The Secret Seat Bomb: Place this secret seat bomb under the cushion of any chair or couch. When someone sits on it, the "BOMB" goes off with a blast! You'll get a million laughs. Completely harmless and may be used over and over again. Only 50¢.
- Magician's Bag of Tricks: Your friends will be shocked and amazed at your new abilities to mystify and fool them. This bag of tricks contains all you'll need — four secret magician's devices plus a complete instruction book on how to do 102 different magic tricks. Only $1.50.
- Magic Cards: Fool and amaze your friends many times over with this trick deck. You'll be the hit of the party. No one will know the secrets but you. This deck comes complete with easy to follow instructions for 10 different tricks. Only $1.50.
- 50 Fighter Planes: You get 50 scale model unbreakable fighter planes of different countries — all you need to reenact history's famous air battles. Hang them from threads and fly them all at once! Only $1.00.
- Frankenstein Mask: Put on this rubber face mask and you'll look like a nightmare come true. Authentic in every detail — you'll be sure to shake up everyone who sees you wearing it. Only $1.98.
- Bloody Soap: Smear some of this powder on any bar of soap. When someone begins to use the soap, it will turn their hands and face bloody red. You won't be able to stop laughing. Completely harmless. Only 25¢.
- Foaming Sugar: This appears to be normal sugar, but when it is dropped into liquid it foams right out of the cup, glass or bowl. Switch it for the real stuff then sit back and wait to laugh. Completely harmless. Only 25¢.
Vintage comic books advertisements have been rich fodder for bloggers, humorists, historians and folks looking for a nostalgia kick since the the Interwebs took flight. Here are some groovy links I found that discuss The Gayle House and some similar products.
- Scar Stuff (2007): Gayle House Records "The Haunting" (Gayle House, GH-101, 1971)
- Mental Floss: 11 Shameless Comic Book Ads That Cost Us Our Allowance Money
- The Peerless Power of Comics (2013): Buy This Comic! Build A Condensing Unit!
- Guff (2015): Old Comic Book Ads That Were Total Scams
- Collectors Weekly (2012): Sea-Monkeys and X-Ray Spex: Collecting the Bizarre Stuff Sold in the Back of Comic Books
Mail-Order Mysteries: Real Stuff from Old Comic Book Ads! by Kirk Demarais.
That book, with a five-star rating, appears to be one thing you can order by mail and not end up being disappointed.
Now, stop reading and go check on your Sea Monkeys!